Thursday, December 9, 2010

"Children Raised by Wolves Score Better on Standardized Tests"

Education researchers at Princeton University announced today the findings of a year-long study that shows children raised in the woods by wolves score, on average, better on standardized tests than children of the same age attending public schools. “This will revolutionize the way we educate our children,” said project head Kimberley Schilling. “We’re not talking Ivy League wolves here. These children were raised by run-of-the-mill wolves, eating a diet of elk, moose, and grasshoppers in the woods behind major highways.” These children scored in the 52nd percentile in reading and the 59th in math, putting them ahead of students in states like Mississippi, Vermont, and Alabama. “We think this sends a clear message to school superintendents. Hire more wolves.”

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