Saturday, October 2, 2010

"Brookstone Projects First Sale in 2011"

Brookstone, the nation’s leading chain of product-testing centers announced today an optimistic projection of selling an item in the next fiscal year. “Up until now we’ve largely existed as a playground for adults,” said Ron Michaelson, Brookstone’s PR chief. “What our customers don’t know is that many of the items inside our locations can actually be purchased.” Brookstone’s lofty projection is based on an optimistic economic forecast and confidence in a $100 million marketing push via print, television, and electronic ads, as well as large signs in the stores that read If You Pay Us Money, You Can Take That Gizmo Home With You. “We admit it’s going to be tough to convince people that these items have any use outside of our stores,” said Michaelson. “What do you mean it’s a store?” said David Mackey, a fireman who visits the Brookstone in his local mall about once a month. “They’re a free massage parlor.”